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To Want

from All Adorned by Model Trains

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lyrics

Are you the moon? Are you doomed to repeat this process once again? Defeated winter, bipolar spring? Is that better than the boredom you’d feel otherwise? Are you okay? More so than you’ve ever been? Can I help in any way? Is it love, or should you act your age? When our generation marries young, it won’t be because of (redacted). It’ll be because we know that when it goes, it all tends to go at once. Some kind of desperate fatalism, cling to the first thing that doesn’t suck. So on starless nights, we close our eyes, we synchronize, you sanctify. In blinding lights behind our eyes, emerge some problems of the mind. Like ‘Don’t know if I want this’, ‘Fairly sure I need this’, and ‘If two months from now, my mind has changed, I promise I will take the blame as such’. But fuck it, who am I to judge? I’m inclined to say the whole thing’s a crutch for those who are not strong enough, to stand alone and to be tough, but I am weak and full of lust to be secure but free enough. And all of these things underlie, that this is what I (redacted).

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from All Adorned, released March 19, 2017

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Model Trains Calgary, Alberta

the old (2014-2018) solo work of aoife josie baker

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